Moby’s sexy sci-fi Christmas musical

by birtanpublished on July 2, 2020

It's that time of year Hasselhoff!

Snoop!

New Kids!

But the best worst Christmas gift of all is
Moby's porn store sci-fi movie musical,

Alien Sex Party

There is an embarrassment of Christmas musical
kitschy riches floating around the stupid

depths of the internet Some of these gems
are timeless and enchanting, like Emmet Otter's

Jugband Christmas

Or the Claymation Christmas Special

And some pair a vegan DJ with an AVN-winning porn star for a touching rendition of

"Silent Night" in an adult video store

Directed by his childhood friend and former bandmate
Paul Yates, Moby financed Alien Sex Party

prior to the million-platinum selling success of Play So it is against that backdrop of

his early very meaningful but somewhat faded success that
we should judge his foray into producing a

Clerks-style comedy about who fucking knows

Set in an erotic video shop on Christmas Eve,
Alien Sex Party features a hodgepodge of Kevin Smith-style

jokes about porn titles like "Foreskin Gump"
and gags about last minute

shopping for items like penis pumps

And Moby isn't the only musician with
his mitts all over this masterpiece

Peter Prescott, the drummer for seminal post-punk Mission
of Burma, helped write some of the music and

has a cameo Plus the Zambonis – featuring Moby
– appear over the film's credits

That band's founding guitarist, Peter Katis,
is actually the longtime producer for the National

It's his wedding you see on the cover of their album Boxer

And wouldn't you love to hear the National cover this jam?

That's Moby's old punk band, the Pork Boys,
with director Paul Yates It's pretty sweet,

but nothing could be as sweet as Moby's performance alongside aging porn star Dyanna Lauren

Truly this film's crown jewel

But don't worry, they kick it out

You may be shocked to learn that Moby was
not entirely stoked about appearing in this film

According to Yates, Play blew up while it was in post-production

and Moby, protective of his new celebrity status, asked to be edited out entirely

Something about it being intentionally embarrassing to be in raincoat and double dildo hat

Remember, these guys are childhood best friends
Yates says that calls from

Moby were just replaced by calls from Moby's manager
And so Paul Yates did the only reasonable thing a man could do

and he sold Moby's eternal soul on eBay for $42

What's your favourite cornball Christmas special?
Let us know in the comments and subscribe

for new episodes of This Exists every Thursday
We've got links to Alien Sex Party clips and

some other festive gems in the description
Happy Holidays, you creeps

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